Yesterday, my dad and I drove around the country. Well my dad drove and I looked for pictures to shoot. It was a fun nature day but a tough photography day. It was cloudy — a doe and fawn ran in front of our car, wild turkeys ran into the woods, a great blue heron flew straight at us and up and over our car. These were fun things to watch — but there was no hope of getting a shot off.
Sometime during our drive, my dad asked if I would ever want to go back and do something over again. There are obvious moments in my life that give me great pause — but I know to do them over changes everything. Not everything for me but everything. To say I wouldn’t enter into a verbally abusive relationship again certainly is logical BUT then my son wouldn’t have been born. I cannot conceive of how many lives he has impacted during his life. If he wasn’t here all those events would have happened differently or not at all. Through my marriage, I met people I never would have met. Gone places I never would have gone. Learned lessons I never would have learned.
So I told my dad, “No way.” I wouldn’t want the responsibility of rewriting history.
I thought about this as we drove around looking for the big herd of cows he had seen. If we had left a couple of minutes later we never would have seen the deer — a couple of minutes sooner and we probably would have hit them. I had gotten out of the car to take a picture of the hill when I spotted the wild turkeys. If I hadn’t seen them we wouldn’t have been driving slowly. If we had been driving a normal speed the heron would have gone through our windshield instead of having the few extra seconds it needed to adjust its flight path when we startled it.
My dad stopped so I could shoot some pictures of ducks alongside the road. My dad was saying, “No. No. No” when the ducks decided to waddle in front of the car to go back home. There was a car coming up behind us. When it saw us stopped — it slowed down. Did we save the ducks by being there at that exact moment? I can’t say. But it is moments like that — that make me work very hard to not label any moment as good or bad — as a keeper or a throw away.
Would you ever go back and relive a moment of your life? If so which one and why?