I used to work until I collapsed in front of the TV or in bed. A few years back I realized I was no longer reading for pleasure because I didn’t have time. So I made time. Every night even if it was only for 5 minutes I read — not for research for my classes — simply for pleasure. Once I made it a priority — I found myself reading for 15 minutes and then a half hour … This was about all the relaxing I did. And even then I needed my mind fully occupied.
But it wasn’t until this last year when MCS took my physical strength and drained it that I realized I was reverting back to my old ways. It took me so long to do simple chores that I never took a day off and often worked until I collapsed in front of the TV.
Tonight after a hot day of doing chores, I sat on my back deck and took photos of the “show” going on in and around my yard. My cat Nox joined me. And I realized, I combined a state of awareness with relaxation and it was joyous. Nox tickled me with her tail. The birds sang and flitted about. My garden enticed with its splashes of color. As the breeze moved across the field, the grasses looked like a green ocean. I still have a list of things to get done but gone is the stress and the sense of urgency.