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“All is Fair in Love,” by Stevie Wonder (song on album Innervisions)

Image1doveYesterday did not go as planned. It was a warmer than normal day with snow — this led to the desire to cross-country ski, a nearby golf course has a trail that follows the river. While I was still in my jammies my dad showed up — both my mom and his sister were having bad health days. He was on his way to check his sister in a city 10 miles away. He requested I go check on my mom.

So instead of communing with nature, I went and sat quietly in my parent’s living room while my mom slept. But as I said in yesterday’s post be with nature in the best way you can. While I was there my brother showed up, my dad came back and my mom got up long enough to have lunch with all of us. While we were waiting for the food to heat up, my mom, dad and myself all stood at their dining room window and watched the mourning doves in the bush. Nature and love both found me in that moment.

My mom told me of her friend who is not feeling well. This friend is beautiful, vibrant and loving. You would never guess her age and yet — according to her doctors — her heart is hardening — she is much older on the inside than the outside.

I have — due to certain family dynamics — been the mature one in the family since I was very little. As I snapped the above photos it made me think about how some people are smooth and calm on the exterior but prickly underneath — some people are mischievous on the outside to hide the roughness of their lives — some people seem to rise above all of the rough patches in their lives.

I’m the one who always covered up my thorny-rough patches with the smooth everything-is-all-right exterior. I have trouble letting people see the real me because I’m afraid they won’t like the real me.

Today’s Intention: I’m going to do something fun that I normally wouldn’t do because I’m afraid other people might think less of me.

Make it something simple. I’ve had my camera for 5 months and it has only been in the last two days that I’ve played with any of the settings. As I look back as to the why? I won two awards for my photos after only taking pictures a few weeks. People liked the photos I posted on-line. Without realizing it I played out the same safe scenario I always have in life. I played out the safe script that if other people like what I’m doing don’t change even the tiniest detail or I may lose everything — instead of course of allowing the script to unfold and maybe gaining everything.

If I change the script — that love I’m seeking will find its way into my heart?

Have a playful day.

Love,

Colleen

P.S. Here are few of the photos that when I played with the settings.